Uber Rides and Catch Twenty-Twos – Entry 156

Dear Diary

I have a little bit to update you on, Dear Diary. The last time we spoke about Karate Kid, I was having a mini meltdown over him spontaneously volunteering to share that he didn’t believe in marriage….this was a deal breaker.

It’d caught me off guard as he’d previously mentioned wanting to settle down at some point and also that he wants to get married in a church or cathedral….from this information, one could safely assume that he wants to get married, right?  That’s what I thought too.

I was in two minds about bringing it up as it’d be an awkward conversational topic. So I decided to wait to see how brave I felt when we were next together. He called me on Monday night to hear how the wedding was. Just before he called though, I’d opened up bank account online to make a transfer and saw five Uber transactions that I hadn’t made! Five trips calculating to a value of 190 dollars!

Karate Kid called at the moment that I realised that I’d been robbed. I was a little hysterical when I answered his call. I didn’t even say hello, all I said was “KK! They’ve stolen my money! They’ve stolen my money!” Understandably, Karate Kid paused for a while whilst processing this information and then asked me to elaborate. He then joked that I may have had too much to drink at the wedding and may not have remembered the joyrides….not funny.

I calmed down a bit and he told me about his weekend whilst I lodged disputes online for my bank to chase. I was half listening obviously, and I asked a silly question  (which in hindsight I should have just kept pretending to listen). I asked which two year old had had the birthday party on the weekend….about one second into his long pause was the moment that I realised that I shouldn’t have asked. Karate Kid was a bit hurt that I didn’t remember. Apparently, he mentioned it last week…..hmmmm, thinking, thinking, got nothing….he eventually told me that it was his niece’s second birthday and this information prompted a vague memory of him telling me about it. To try and make it better I said that I do listen generally, and that when I don’t hear something it’s because I’m likely deep in thought…..this didn’t go down so well with Karate Kid either.

As a self defending side note, just between you and I, why should I make an effort to remember his family’s birthdays when I’m not part of his family? Okay, okay, he probably did mention that the niece he adores so much was having a birthday party, maybe once or maybe twice (I couldn’t tell you as I wasn’t listening) but when it’s not relevant to my day to day living I can’t be expected to remember it. Right? Haha.

After our phone conversation I called the bank to cancel my Visa card. The man over the phone said that he’d block all six transactions…..”six?” I asked. During my phone conversation with Karate Kid the joy rider had used my hard earned money to fund another Uber trip! They’d officially stolen 205.46 dollars of my money. Hopefully, the bank’s fraud team will get my money back.

On a positive note, Karate Kid came to visit on Tuesday night and I casually brought up the topic of viewpoints on marriage. I did put in a lot of thought as to how to best orchestrate it. When we were lying down together I said “KK?” he asked me “yes?”…things were unfolding perfectly! So I sweetly said “I think that it was last weekend sometime when we were in the kitchen you told me that you didn’t believe in marriage. I said that I believe that it’s symbolic. I’d forgotten about it until now. Did you really mean it? Or were you just joking”

He layed quietly. I could feel him thinking. There was no way I was letting me leave that night without a straight answer. He eventually laughed as he found it amusing that I’d forgotten it until now. Part of me wanted to snap at him that it’d almost made me try to break up with him again. Instead, I sweetly probed further “Yes, I couldn’t tell if you were serious or not.” He paused and then said in a genuine tone that he did believe in marriage. I then hit him playfully and asked why he’d said it in the first place. He just laughed and never answered. I believe that it was his unfunny and dumb way of finding out how I felt about marriage. He did get an honest answer from me, but it could have come at a big cost. 


Let me give you a little update on a benign and non-threatening distant potential. He’s the New Yorker who I mentioned sent me a random Facey message last week. We’d spoken on the phone maybe twice back in 2014 and he said that he’d come visit me in the town that I was living in then. The proposed weekend came and went and he didn’t come, so I decided to cut ties with him.

Logging in to read his new message brought up previous conversations:

2015. NYC: “Hi Anastasia. I don’t know if you remember me but we used to talk on the phone when I lived in XXXXX. I’ve since moved back to New York. How have you been?” 

I replied that I did remember him and said that I was well. He said that he was happy that I remembered him and asked me another generic question that I never replied to.

29/3/16. NYC: “My Anastasia?”

He then sent this link:

30/3/16. Me: “That’s a bit sad” (something tells me that I wasn’t impressed).
30/3/16. NYC: “I thought it was amusing – I must have a bad sense of humour lol 🙂 …..you look beautiful…I won’t jump off a bridge if you were my surprise bride 🙂 hehe….what’s happening in your life?”
Definitely a bad sense of humour as it wasn’t funny at all. And, also a bad sense of judgement if he thought I’d ever be anyone’s surprise bride.
31/3/16. Me: “Have been pretty busy. Work’s good.”
Even I think that that was a bit short, but looking at things in perspective he’d stood me up two years beforehand, offended me by making fun of a poor Singaporean lady and then freaked me out by suggesting I could be his surprise bride…..It’d be over a year until he would contact me again:
27/10/17. NYC. “Hey! How’s life??”
8/11/2017. Me: “Hey NYC! Life’s great thanks. How are you?”
This time I felt like being friendly just to see what this guy had to say for himself. He had no new photos since 2014 that I could see uploaded. His timeline suggested that he’d been traveling in Korea and China earlier in the year. He replied a day after my message and said that he’d been back in New York for a couple of months and that I should go to see the move Thor. My curiosity was satisfied with this so I didn’t reply.
Let’s segue to Thursday night. Karate Kid wanted me to go to the next pub choir with him. I wasn’t going to go as he had wanted other friends to go that time which hurt my feelings as pub choir was our thing. Our friends were busy with a special dance class workshops so it was just going to be him and I. I was still feeling sensitive and was also feeling a bit stressed about my Visa card being compromised and so said that I’d like to go for a walk or to see a movie, instead. He called me soon after and suggested that we go to a now-trendy part of town where he grew up. He wanted to show me the tree that he used to play in with his cousins. This made me happy.
I enjoyed Thursday night because it was simple and sweet. We looked at the tree he used to climb in. We went to look at his old elementary school and the library where he’d spend most of his school vacations. We had sushi and then some ice cream. After listening to why I wanted to move and where he told me more about him. I’ll share with you some highlights:
– he wants to move back to that suburb one day to settle down and raise a family.
– he said that he wanted to go and look inside the elementary school and that we could pretend that I was pregnant and future school shopping as our alibi (he patted my tummy when he said this).
– he shared what games he played at school, and
– where his Father and Cousin are buried.
It was a nice evening. He also said that he wanted me to go to Dance Teacher’s dance congress on this weekend. I honestly didn’t feel like it so said that I’d do what I felt like doing. He had already contacted Dance Teacher and re-organised my free entry despite me not helping further with the event. It was a sweet gesture but I didn’t feel like going and couldn’t tell you exactly why – Maybe a phase?
On Friday afternoon Karate Kid sent a message: “Come tonight. It’ll be fun. I want to dance with you”.
I decided I’d take my little brother to see Thor instead  (must have been inspired by a hot tipoff from a New Yorker). Part of me doesn’t want to go to the weekend dance congress parties as I’m sure Plain Jane Peasant Maiden will be there and it’ll turn me green with jealousy seeing Karate Kid dance with her. I’m not in the mood to stew over that. I’ve got my blocked Visa card and now my caput laptop to deal with.
The catch twenty twos are:
1. I need my laptop access my bank account to transfer funds between accounts to purchase a new laptop……that or wait until payday and buy a new laptop when I have enough cash in my account (damn you person who stole my money using Uber!)
2. I won’t know if Plain Jane Peasant Maiden is back and a threat unless I go and witness their interactions with my own eyes….but, I don’t want to go as it’ll make me upset seeing it…..
3. Also, I’m not 100% sure how to conduct myself with Karate Kid in front of our friends. Are we pretending that nothing’s happening still? Or are we displaying that we are official? The quickest way to find out ia to go to the parties and see what happens…but again, that’ll probably just upset me.
In other news, The Spaniard sent a message: “Hola Anastasia, how are you? …..I’m thinking about changing my cologne. Seeing as I know that you have good taste…..what’s your favorite men’s cologne?”
Does he really value my opinion on men’s scents so highly? Or is it just a reason to say hello? It is two weeks until my flights to Spain were meant to be….
Image: [Jana Gouthova] © 123RF.com

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