Dear Diary

I have a little bit to update you on, Dear Diary. The last time we spoke about Karate Kid, I was having a mini meltdown over him spontaneously volunteering to share that he didn’t believe in marriage….this was a deal breaker.

It’d caught me off guard as he’d previously mentioned wanting to settle down at some point and also that he wants to get married in a church or cathedral….from this information, one could safely assume that he wants to get married, right?  That’s what I thought too.

I was in two minds about bringing it up as it’d be an awkward conversational topic. So I decided to wait to see how brave I felt when we were next together. He called me on Monday night to hear how the wedding was. Just before he called though, I’d opened up bank account online to make a transfer and saw five Uber transactions that I hadn’t made! Five trips calculating to a value of 190 dollars!

Karate Kid called at the moment that I realised that I’d been robbed. I was a little hysterical when I answered his call. I didn’t even say hello, all I said was “KK! They’ve stolen my money! They’ve stolen my money!” Understandably, Karate Kid paused for a while whilst processing this information and then asked me to elaborate. He then joked that I may have had too much to drink at the wedding and may not have remembered the joyrides….not funny.

I calmed down a bit and he told me about his weekend whilst I lodged disputes online for my bank to chase. I was half listening obviously, and I asked a silly question  (which in hindsight I should have just kept pretending to listen). I asked which two year old had had the birthday party on the weekend….about one second into his long pause was the moment that I realised that I shouldn’t have asked. Karate Kid was a bit hurt that I didn’t remember. Apparently, he mentioned it last week…..hmmmm, thinking, thinking, got nothing….he eventually told me that it was his niece’s second birthday and this information prompted a vague memory of him telling me about it. To try and make it better I said that I do listen generally, and that when I don’t hear something it’s because I’m likely deep in thought…..this didn’t go down so well with Karate Kid either.

As a self defending side note, just between you and I, why should I make an effort to remember his family’s birthdays when I’m not part of his family? Okay, okay, he probably did mention that the niece he adores so much was having a birthday party, maybe once or maybe twice (I couldn’t tell you as I wasn’t listening) but when it’s not relevant to my day to day living I can’t be expected to remember it. Right? Haha.

After our phone conversation I called the bank to cancel my Visa card. The man over the phone said that he’d block all six transactions…..”six?” I asked. During my phone conversation with Karate Kid the joy rider had used my hard earned money to fund another Uber trip! They’d officially stolen 205.46 dollars of my money. Hopefully, the bank’s fraud team will get my money back.

On a positive note, Karate Kid came to visit on Tuesday night and I casually brought up the topic of viewpoints on marriage. I did put in a lot of thought as to how to best orchestrate it. When we were lying down together I said “KK?” he asked me “yes?”…things were unfolding perfectly! So I sweetly said “I think that it was last weekend sometime when we were in the kitchen you told me that you didn’t believe in marriage. I said that I believe that it’s symbolic. I’d forgotten about it until now. Did you really mean it? Or were you just joking”

He layed quietly. I could feel him thinking. There was no way I was letting me leave that night without a straight answer. He eventually laughed as he found it amusing that I’d forgotten it until now. Part of me wanted to snap at him that it’d almost made me try to break up with him again. Instead, I sweetly probed further “Yes, I couldn’t tell if you were serious or not.” He paused and then said in a genuine tone that he did believe in marriage. I then hit him playfully and asked why he’d said it in the first place. He just laughed and never answered. I believe that it was his unfunny and dumb way of finding out how I felt about marriage. He did get an honest answer from me, but it could have come at a big cost. 

Let me give you a little update on a benign and non-threatening distant potential. He’s the New Yorker who I mentioned sent me a random Facey message last week. We’d spoken on the phone maybe twice back in 2014 and he said that he’d come visit me in the town that I was living in then. The proposed weekend came and went and he didn’t come, so I decided to cut ties with him.

Logging in to read his new message brought up previous conversations:

2015. NYC: “Hi Anastasia. I don’t know if you remember me but we used to talk on the phone when I lived in XXXXX. I’ve since moved back to New York. How have you been?” 

I replied that I did remember him and said that I was well. He said that he was happy that I remembered him and asked me another generic question that I never replied to.

29/3/16. NYC: “My Anastasia?”

He then sent this link: