Dear Diary
My sincerest apologies for taking four months to write to you. I am still alive and all is relatively well. We have so much to catch up on. I have been thinking of you and making note of everything that I want to share. I stopped writing because my laptop died. I purchased a new one in December and then life happened…
Short recap – The last we spoke I was preparing for Karate Kid’s surprise birthday party with the help of his sisters. It was a complete success and he enjoyed the evening. I wish I had been writing then to tell you more about it, but we will move on as much more has happened.
There has been a lot of change in my life since the dawn of 2019. One of the most important things is that Karate Kid and I have adopted a rescue dog, let’s call him Munchkin-chops (I usually refer to him as this, or as my little Prince). Munchkinchops is chihuahua cross miniature fox terrier. He is turning 12 this year and has had a very tough life. From the little that we know he has been neglected and likely abandoned.
Munchkinchops has come a very long way since we adopted him. We have had to get all his teeth, bar one, removed as they were rotten. As you can imagine, this was a costly exercise and also involved repair of an exposed nerve in his mouth. The poor darling was in very bad shape, traumatised and malnourished when we first me him. He has improved dramatically and is now spoiled with love, quality food, twice-daily walkies and also being taken mostly anywhere his mother goes 😉
Karate Kid has embraced his role as surrogate father of Munchkinchops. He is very caring, loving and devoted to caring for our little man. It comforts me seeing these qualities in him. What also warms my heart is that he refers to Munchkinchops and I as his family, and he plans around our needs (can you believe it’s the same KK as before? Sometimes I have to pinch myself, too).
For most of January, Karate Kid and I travelled to spend time with my extended family and getting to know our Munchkinchops.
Another major change has been that I have started hypnosis therapy. Now, please, before you judge, please hear me out. I do attribute my success to everything that I’m about to share with you to unlocking my inner potential through hypnosis sessions.
In late January, I commenced sessions with a local hypnotherapist out of curiosity. They were having a promotional sale and I thought I’d sample a session to see if it aided my sleep and stress levels.
After one session, I felt like my younger self. The self that was ambitious and achieved what she set her mind to. I listened to the recorded sessions daily as prescribed and found a renewed sense of excitement with what the world had to offer me. That’s when I had an epiphany – I could start putting into motion right then and there what I wanted.
I bought a special marker to write on the television screen and windows with. I wrote positive affirmations, dreams and goals. I would look at them and believe I’d have them soon. They were:
- A unit with 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms and 2 car spaces in a secure garage. It would be modern and spacious with natural lighting. It would be conveniently located next to public transport, good schools for future children and basic necessities. I would be able to spend the same amount of rent, or less, on mortgage repayments. It would also be for XXXX dollars in value.
- General exercise goals and body shape goals (I won’t bore you with these details)
- Free from financial debt by June 2020 (more for KK)
- Invest in shares: XX amount of dollars over XX amount of years (this is yet to be implemented as you’ll soon see why).
In February, I decided to buy a property. I had a choice between a ‘perfect home’ that didn’t quite match the description above and an investment that could be a great opportunity. I boycotted the ‘perfect home’ and went to auction and purchased a split/dual key unit well under market value. I am sure the circumstances for the seller were not desirable, but I held firm with my ridiculously low price and refused to offer more. My secret was that I was adamant that I wanted a killer bargain and that I knew they were desperate to sell from what the real estate had inadvertently hinted.
Friends and real estate agents in the past had mocked me for my shamelessly low offers on properties, they would say “Anastasia, there’s no way that you’ll find something like that in the inner-city area, just no way“. I knew different. I wanted an amazing deal and wasn’t going to settle for less – and I got it. I walked away with a two bedroom, two bathroom and one car space unit in the inner city for a price less than that of a one bedroom unit or studio apartment with a car space. Please be aware that the unit does not come without it’s blemishes, but the return on investment far outweighs this (most people were deterred by this but I was able to see the potential).
In theory, that all sounds great, right? Well, yes, but the best things in life don’t come easily. Despite being overly prepared with finance and trust structuring before even going to auction, the bank turned around and declined the loan a week before the settlement date. This was devastatingly stressful as no other bank could process the mortgage within a week. I had to ask family to help and am grateful that I had that opportunity, otherwise I would have lost a lot of money and also a great investment.
Rest assured, I have almost rectified the situation and all will be sorted for all parties involved. The other good news is that both portions of the split/dual key apartment have been rented and the unit is quietly paying itself off without needing my input.
When Karate Kid witnessed me perform this modern day miracle (and the insane stress that went along with it), he decided that he’d like to do the same one day too. I told him that I’d help him find a bargain and do the calculations to make sure that it was cash flow positive when the time came. Firstly, he needed to clear out his current debt (by June 2020…). I pointed out to Karate Kid that I didn’t just turn into an investor overnight, it has taken years of reading into property and finance to prepare me mentally to be able to take on such a feat. The hypnosis sessions were the final push I needed for the dormant, brooding me to squeeze through the cocoon to become a butterfly.
Needless to say, this success has rubbed off on Karate Kid. He has been more driven and focused on improving himself and his circumstances. He is even taking on overtime shifts so that the extra money can be put towards his personal debt to pay it off quicker. KK has started up running and is becoming more goal focused. He is also preparing himself to become a manager (I think he has more to change before he’ll be ready, and I tell him gently what needs to be improved so that he has awareness of it). Positive change is positive change, nonetheless, and I am proud of him for doing this.
But that didn’t get her what she wanted? – you are justified in asking that. It just meant that I took a detour on the way to getting what I wanted. With one success under my belt I was ready for more blood. I knew that I had the capacity to snag one more bargain while the market was how it was, so I started looking, and found the home described in the dream list above, but for 40K more than what I could afford to pay…..
I went to inspect the place and it was in good shape. By now, after seeing maybe 10 different places over a few months I knew what questions to ask and was confident in grilling the real estate agents. When asked, I kindly told the real estate agent what my limit was (40K under the asking price) and went on my way.
To cut a long story short, I inspected the unit twice more before formally putting in an offer for my budget and asked for an extended settlement period (I wasn’t getting burned twice). The real estate agent wasn’t impressed, but I explained that the seller would have a guaranteed sale if they took my offer. I also said that I was just playing it safe and that if I could settle sooner that we could negotiate it later.
I didn’t hear from the real estate agent for about 4 days. I was prepared to walk away, after all, I could use my money to be better invested elsewhere. I just wanted this place as it could be my forever-home (and importantly, a good investment if I did decide to move in future). When the real estate agent got back to me with the seller’s wishes, I was shocked – they accepted my offer. It was a dream come true, literally.
Long story short, the best part of March and April have been dedicated to filling in forms and co-ordinating renting the investment property and playing banks off against each other to get the best rates and deals. It has been a testing time, but I’ve achieved what I set out to do. Settlement of the dream home will be in the coming two weeks. I will likely move in in late July or August (depending on when I can break my current lease).
My Father had ‘the talk’ with me some time early in the year about not waiting too long to have children. My Mother also had ‘the talk’ with me about starting a family soon as she went through menopause early. Conversations like this are always awkward for my family. What complicated things were that my Father expressed concern that Karate Kid hasn’t offered any form of commitment and that he didn’t want him taking advantage of me.
I told both my parents that I wouldn’t be in the right head space to have children until I had a home I could easily afford to repay on a part-time wage….this has since manifested.
As for Karate Kid and commitment, well, I told them I wouldn’t trust any man and my assets and that there are ways to make them undesirable to attempt to take (i.e. a lot of debt over the property, but the property is geared positively so not financial burden to me day-to-day). I decided against a financially binding agreement at this stage as Karate Kid cannot afford it, but agrees to the notion of keeping out assets separate until we are one entity.
I spoke with my hypnotherapist about what I wanted. I told her that I felt that I needed to find my forever home first before I could have children or start a side business that I could grow to replace my income. Her sessions did help me to clarify this within myself and so I set out to manifest change.
I have spoken with KK about the timeline of things (i.e. having babies) and he is very supportive (Yes, I also sometimes can’t believe we are still talking about the same person as a year ago). We have even been collecting potential names of future children. Most of the names are on the ‘maybe’ or ‘never’ list as we don’t like each other’s name preferences.
I really like the names: Pearl, Ruby, Annalise, Jessebelle, Jasmin, Emarina, Scarlet, Zoe, Jacob, Nicholas, Marcus, Lucas, Theodore, Zachary, plus many more.
Karate Kid wants the name Zelda, Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter. I can’t recall the masculine names. I would be happy with Summer Rose, but Karate Kid doesn’t concur.
Karate Kid has said that I can name the first child if he can name the second. I am hesitant and the thought of single-mother IVF has crossed my mind multiple times. My apologies for anyone I may offend with my name preferences, they are simply preferences and everyone is different. I don’t expect people to like my name choices or even my name for whatever reasons they have.
What next…hmmm let’s touch on my self-inflicted chaotic health journey. I decided to get laser eye corrective surgery so not to rely on glasses or contact lenses. On the day of surgery, the machine for my procedure was malfunctioning, so I was offered an older procedure. This procedure was more invasive and required more recovery time. For convenience reasons, I accepted.
In essence, I could not see for a week, instead of the prior one day downtime I had prepared for (I was going to do so much diary writing within my week off, but couldn’t even read). Of course, this extended downtime coincided with the purchase of the dream home, but didn’t stop me from keeping the ball going. I even read and signed the contract of offer with one watery eye slightly opened moving my head back and forth to make the letters as clear as possible.
In summary, I healed relatively well within that week but will take a few more months for the vision to completely correct. Munchkinchops loved spending every day sleeping by my side whilst I was drugged up and recuperating.
After that, I decided that I might as well get my impacted wisdom teeth corrected. A dentist had told me he could do it in the chair after seeing my X-rays and because I love a good bargain, I agreed (two dentists in the past had said I’d need a specialist, which would cost three times as much).
The picture above shows the complexity of my teeth. It was the same on each side. The plan was to remove the crown of the wisdom teeth only, and the leave the roots in the jaw as they were in contact with nerves. “This is what a specialist would do anyway, it’s called a coronectomy” is what I was told (rough Latin translation = removal of crown).
On Wednesday 3rd April, I had them removed in the chair. Ever since, I have had problems. Two courses of antibiotics and two sessions to drain puss from my gums and swollen face, I decided that it was unusual and needed a specialist’s review. In hindsight, I think we can all safely say that this was a bad idea. My new mantra is that one should not skimp on healthcare.
Let’s fast forward until yesterday. I had an appointment with a specialist. He was concerned at my ongoing pain and persistent infection. He ordered a scan and the results did surprise me.
I will share the copy of the real scans when I have them available (apparently, it takes seven days to upload them for patients to see their own results on their portal). You can see I have improvised above by circling the part of tooth still remaining in my jaw (on both sides….). There is also damage the the roots of the adjacent teeth which will require root canals on both sides once I have my mouth fixed.
I didn’t really need the specialist to tell me that a coronectomy should have removed the entire crown of the tooth, but I still appreciated his time and patience to explain what had gone wrong. My surgery will be next Friday 3rd of May (exactly a month after the first attempt). I will likely experience permanent parasethesia of my lower lip on both sides because the roots need to come out now due to the ongoing infection. This is, and the cost, is what distresses me the most. Life has been expensive for me recently, and I still have property outgoings and Lawyer fees to pay next month for my dream home….gulp (but I promise, Dear Diary, that everything is going to be okay and that I can budget like a boss when I need to).
I do not plan to pursue litigation with the dentist. My reasons are he phoned me today and offered a refund (obviously, the specialist had been in contact with him to share his two cents). I also truly believe that the dentist had my best interests at heart and did the best job he could. I am sure that he has a large university debt and is likely year paying it off, me suing him could be devastating for him. I also believe that everyone makes mistakes and that is part of being human. I am tending to the situation promptly (luckily, I have some common sense) and I have been told by two separate dentists in the past that I’d need to have them surgically removed.
Looking at the bright side:
- I do not have severe complications like infective endocarditis or osteomyelitis of the mandible – I would be seeking compensation for something like this.
- My employer pays sick leave, so I will be enjoying an extended, but painful, second wisdom-tooth holiday from work.
- I am getting the procedure I should have had in the first place which has the same risk of nerve damage and same costs that I was actively avoiding for a few years too many.
- More quality snuggle time with Munchkinchops and comfort ice-cream (because a soft diet is important, haha).
I must also note that Karate Kid has been overly supportive and helpful to me over the past couple of months when I haven’t been in full health. He has stepped up and is transforming into the amazing type of man I want in my life.
One moment that I had was just this week when we went to a small restaurant to get a quick dinner. It was windy outside where we were seated with Munchkinchops. Karate Kid sat opposite me and said he would block the wind to protect me. This, Dear Diary, this is how a real man treats a lady. Karate Kid isn’t who he used to be, and moments like this hit me like a steam train.
I will be writing again soon to you to tell you more about the business course that I’m taking to learn to create an e-business. I also have some confessions to share about a man that I have been discreetly talking with for a few weeks. I have updates on my Newly Single Friend and also on Mr Nice Guy.
I hope you have been well. Happy New Year and my apologies again for not writing to you sooner, Dear Diary.
Anastasia xo
IMAGE: Wix.com
The Contemporary Princess 