Derogative, Derogatory – Potato, Potarto – Entry 126

Dear Diary

It’s been a busy past few days.

Following on from the conversation with Karate Kid last week, he eventually won me over despite my fiery mood. After a few hours of waiting he finally sent a reply to my message saying that if I wasn’t girl or sugar mama that maybe he should stop texting the number as he must have the wrong person. This peeved me even further and I sent a subtle message: “You can call me Anastasia like everyone else. It’s much nicer than girl.” The message I wanted to convey was that if he wanted to act like a friend then he would be treated like one too.

He sent the perfect reply to diffuse the situation: “What about snowflake?”  This message softened me instantly. He then phoned and after a discussion he got me to laugh. He asked why I didn’t like being called girl (I still don’t know why he had to ask in the first place!). I told him that it was derogative….we both paused then he asked me again and I repeated that it was derogative….I self consciously said that I felt I was mispronouncing the word….he agreed….I googled it on my phone whilst we were talking – derogatory, that’s what I meant! We laughed together, it was kind of funny as English is my first language. I agreed to go to the pub choir with him on Thursday night….

The pub choir was actually lots of fun. I’d definitely recommend the experience. I think it was a big step for Karate Kid and I as it was the first time out in public where we had PDAs (public displays if affection). We went to get German sausages before the choir and he held my hand as we ran to cross the road. The rest of the time he had his arm firmly around my waist. During the choir as well he had his arm around my shoulder or waist at all times. It was really nice. I still wondered what we would do if we came across someone we knew.

After the choir we went for a walk and he took us for ice cream. At the ice cream parlor he took a selfie of us cuddled up together eating our ice creams. Then he suggested that we go to the popular dance club nearby (the one where The Clashing of the Titans occurred). I agreed and we walked side by side on the way in. Upstairs we danced a bit before I said that I was tired. On the way out there was a photographer so he stopped for us to have a photo together (I felt that he wanted official third party evidence that we were a ‘thing’). As we got to the entrance he held my hand….at the entrance having their ID checked by security was the handsome Colombian. We smiled at each other and said hola. I’m sure he assessed the situation correctly….I wondered if he thought to himself ‘What does he have that I don’t?”  It would be a fair enough question to ask considering the handsome Colombian was absolutely gorgeous, could dance, speak Spanish and ran his own business….but Karate Kid has this X-factor about him….so hard to compare. Karate Kid then walked me to my car and we kissed goodbye. It had been a really nice night together.

The next morning the photo of us was up. I didn’t know as I hadn’t been online. It wouldn’t be until Saturday at the dance flashmob that Karate Kid would ask me if I’d seen it…I said no and he insisted I look at it. I eventually did look and I appeared dopey or like I’d been drugged – no way was that going on my profile. Karate Kid had tagged us both and the photo was on his timeline….could it be that he wanted to declare to the world that we were an item? I wasn’t ready for my family to fire questions about what we were and who this guy was! Luckily it was a bad shot of me so I had an out.

At the flashmob Mr Friendly was there. His mother came to greet me. She remembered me from many years ago. I wondered if she was hopeful that I’d fall for her son. Not today sorry. He’s a nice guy but I’d rather stay friends with him for now.

Karate Kid came late. He had decided to not help with the barbecue and I was upset as I felt that he may not be going at all as he didn’t care if he saw me or not (irrational I know, but that’s how I saw the situation). I forgave him immediately when I learned that he had taken the morning to get his mother’s car serviced. It was instant redemption hearing this – I thought to myself that this man was reliable family man material.

After the flashmob performances there was a small amount of social dancing for the public to enjoy watching. It was hot and the barbecue would take time to cook so Karate Kid asked me if I’d like to get something before the barbecue. We walked side by side at the start to get food and drink. After a few blocks he put his arm around my waist and we went on a detour through a local council festival. We played with hula hoops, posed at different selfie stations and went on a children’s train ride – so much fun. He took a few photos on his phone of us. When we got to the barbecue we walked side by side and mingled with other people. I figured that he mustn’t be ready to declare it to the world after all despite my previous assumption.

Part way through the barbecue I announce that I’ll be leaving. Karate Kid offers to walk me to my car. We walk side by side until we are out of sight and then he puts his arm around my waist. I just go with it and accept things as they are. I was happy with things being on the down low until I was happy that I was happy. We knew that we’d see each other later that night at a dance party. He said he’d be late as he’d go to a different party first.

The party felt empty until Karate Kid arrived. I didn’t realise that part of the excitement of the dance parties was the potential to meet someone or connect with someone. I was happy to see him but avoided saying hello until he found me after 15 minutes of arriving. We shared a dance to a remix of Little Mix’s Secret Love Song. We sang together like usual and when it got to the part which went “why can’t I kiss you on the dance floor” he gave me a quick kiss on the side of the cheek. I kept my eyes closed wondering if anyone had witnessed it. I also wondered if he had wanted people to see it so that they would start talking – I mean, he was becoming sloppy with covering our tracks just recently…maybe it was a convenient way to let the cat out of the bag so that other men got the message that he wanted me off the market?

I told him that I wouldn’t stay for much longer and he said he’d walk me to my car. Karate Kid hovered around reading posters on the wall whilst I changed my shoes. Just before leaving Mr Shy Guy came to find me and asked if I was being Cinderella. I laughed and said he’d caught me out. He looked at Karate Kid who had his back to us and we gave each other a hug as I said goodbye. Out the door and around the corner out of sight Karate Kid puts his arm around me and walks me to my car. At my car I tell him that my housemate would be away on Sunday evening. He says that he’d like to stay for the night. It made me so happy hearing this. We kissed goodnight and I drove home.

Karate Kid did come to stay on Sunday night. This time he brought work clothes for the next day. We cooked spaghetti and played wrestling before going to bed. He was the Hulk and I was Wonder Woman. The next morning I cook us breakfast…which didn’t turn out as delicious as I would have hoped as I burnt the onion….he still ate it though. At the dining table he looked at me and looked at me. I kept saying ‘what?’ as a way of objecting to the staring – What was he thinking? Was he happy? Was he judging me? Did he think I was fussing over him too much? Was he in disbelief that this was actually happening? – whatever it was I couldn’t tell and the constant stare was uncomfortable.

After breakfast he brushes his teeth and then comes to hug me goodbye. He asks if he can tell me something….I freeze…what could he possibly want to say? I prepared to pretend not to panic to whatever he’d say next: “So, I know that you’re not on the contraceptive pill…and well…you know this morning I wasn’t sure if….you’re female, you know about the morning after pill, right?” I was surprised by this – for one, I was sure there was no way that I could get pregnant seeing as he had a condom the whole time and there were no major blow outs. Two, it just wasn’t going to happen and it would be very difficult to achieve under the given circumstances. Three, I don’t want to get pregnant and I’d deal with it if I ever came to front that situation. He looked at me with a serious look on his face, it made me feel like I was a bad influence on him or something – but I was so relaxed and blasé about the situation as the threat of pregnancy had not crossed my mind as it just wasn’t going to happen. I told him that there was nothing to worry about as I wanted a puppy dog before a child.

In other news, I broke my rule not to initiate a text to The Spaniard since the last text…but I felt I had to as it was his birthday per Facey – ooops! So I sent him a birthday message and he thanked me and told me that his birthday was the day before…at least I tried, right? I won’t send any more messages until I hear from him from now on. If I haven’t heard from him in two weeks I’ll plan my trip to not include much of him or Barcelona……Spain trip #2 is only 10 weeks away! Eeep!


Image: [Jana Gouthova] ©

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