At Crossroads – Entry 83

Dear Diary

It’s always a strange feeling returning home after being abroad. Is it rediscovered clarity that makes you want to reassess everything and plan for a future in a new direction? I could just be speaking for myself also. Perhaps, others are happy to be back at home and to resume their usual lives that they missed.

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and researching in my jet-lagged stage. Working in a foreign Country was always appealing to me and thoughts of it come every so often into my head. Barriers that I create usually consist of painful visa process with no guarantee of work, foreign language, finances, the thought of what I may miss out on if not in my home Country….and I could go on but these are the main things.

My sleepless nights have been spent looking at extensive visa requirements, job postings in Spain, foreign companies in Spain, citizenship requirements, my family tree and any potential descendant citizenship opportunities from this. Also, which Countries I may be able to ‘buy’ citizenship in. I’ve learned a lot but haven’t come up with a good plan as I need to make my end goal clear.

I have been missing The Spaniard and have been wondering if he misses me. I knew that he was at a dance congress on the weekend so occupied but really wanted to speak with him. He had sent a couple of short messages asking how I was. They just weren’t enough to satisfy me so I sent a message late Sunday evening (his time) and said that I couldn’t stop thinking about Spain and would love to speak to him some time. He liked the idea of that and got in touch with me today to organise a time for this evening that we can talk. I’m having major doubts about how interested he is in me. I don’t know if it’s strong enough to endure the distance as much as I would like it to.

The Musician has been in contact. He is happy that I’m back and has good news that he now has a job. His first day was actually today so I will wait to hear how it went. He has set up a time for this Saturday morning for us to meet (as I said that I am very jet-lagged still). I wonder if he will pick a cafe and maybe even pay for my coffee now that he has a job….

There has been a blast from the past in the last few days that I should mention. We shall call him the Dental Technician. He is friends with Mr Obsessed (who is a Dentist). We all studied together in the first year of University many years ago. The Dental Technician had always fancied me and one of my friends. He was overly friendly and confident despite not having grounds for it. He was harmless so we allowed him to be friends with us but kept him at a distance. Fortunately for my friend and I, we both found respective boyfriends (This is a story for another time…’s not the time nor place for that particular chapter). So, the Dental Technician has added me on Facey and sent a message saying that he’d learned that I had moved to the city (most likely a tip-off from Mr Obsessed). He really wanted to see me again. A quick snoop of his profile revealed some important information: that he was learning the dance style that I do a lot of; he’d befriended Dance Teacher on Facey which equates to him coming to my dance parties from now on!; he was apparently single and had deleted his old profile…to bury the past?; and, he’d put on a bit of weight. I told him I was jet-lagged but would be happy to catch up. He chirpily replied that we could lock something in as soon as I was well…..

Karate Kid has been in touch. He was rather hurt when he found out that I was back in the Country and hadn’t notified him. I told him that I had been preoccupied (by the way, my Father is doing well. Likely will be home from hospital in a week). After a bit to toing and froing he said that he wanted to see me again when I was well. He asked me to send him a picture of myself and I declined saying I was sick = not pretty. He said it didn’t matter. I still said no. Today he joked that he’d bring me chicken soup, canned and microwaved as his cooking would be of poor quality. I thought he was joking but he’s asked for my address which may be the fourth time he’s done so in the past six months but I’ve never given it to him….will wait a while before replying as I’m not exactly sure if he’s joking or serious. I haven’t been excited about seeing Karate Kid because of how things unfolded before my trip, he’s like mould…slowly grows on you.


Image: [Jana Gouthova] ©

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